AU - an acronym for FARCE

The AU meets currently in Sharm-el-Sheikh. Competent mostly at doing nothing, this remarkable organisation succeeds once again in doing nothing. While, based on its own statutes it should have expelled Robert Gabrielle Mugabe from its ranks and from his big leather chair, because he wasn't democratically elected, he has been welcomed. He was also asked to start negotiations with the elected President of Zimbabwe, Mr Morgan Tsvangirai. Sadly Bob Madhat has no interest in doing so, and that's the end. The end. Prospective dictators of the world, learn your lesson: you WILL get away with it, unless you're planning on kidnapping an oilrich country. If you do (see Kuwait and Iraq), the world suddenly is concerned about the country in question. So pick a reasonably poor place without major natural resources, and - really - you can do what you want.

Hey, while I'm at it, the AU is, of course, sponsored by Western taxpayers, courtesy of their governments. Why not stop sponsoring expensive luxury hotel stays for those comedians (pardon me, African leaders) altogether.

Thank you Paddy Ashdown!

At long last, someone is speaking sense in the 'international community'. While the slaughter in Zimbabwe continues unabated, and the delusional, syphilitic and somewhat deranged dictator running the show there declares that he can only be removed from office by God, Africans are once again paying the price for the useless leaders they elected to high office. The one country that could long have made a difference in Zim, South Africa, has been governed by Zanu-PF's (oops, the ANC's) Thabo Mbeki. Remember: Thabo-the-man hasn't seen anyone yet die on AIDS in the country that he has misgoverned for the last 8-10 years or so, and (while holding hands with Bob Madhat Gabrielle Mugabe) he declared that he doesn't think there's a major problem in Zimbabwe. So, the millions of illegal Zim refugees in South Africa are not really an indication that Bob Madhat Gabrielle Mugabe stuffed it up. Not at all, according to Thabo and his lover Robert Madhat Gabrielle Mugabe. That much is clear. Reassuringly the leadership void that is Thabo Mbeki has been filled by many African leaders who have condemned the rapidly escalating genocide in Zimbabwe.

Comes Paddy Ashdown. He suggests in today's TIMES that may be the time has come for a military intervention in Zimbabwe, to stop the thugs governing the country from destroying what's left of it, and to stop them from killing more brave Zimbabweans. Sadly, however, Zimbabwe has no oil to speak of, hence this almost certainly is not going to happen any time soon. All we've got is black-on-black violence, and as anyone knows, that doesn't really count. If there is no other reason than to preserve their lives, we can almost be certain that no truly international intervention will be forthcoming. To be fair, SADC or the AU could send their own troops, but they're probably equally unwilling to interfere with this Zim home-made problem.

African trade unions against Bob Mugabe

For the last couple of weeks a shipment of Chinese weapons has unsuccessfully tried to reach its destination, Zimbabwe, the country ruined by Bob Madhat Mugabe and his thugs. Of course, initially the shipment was provided with the usual coverage that African leaders like Thabo Mbeki are known to offer to African dictators ('we have no idea what's on the ship, it might just be cereal for the starving Zimbabweans'). Well, since then a combative South African priest, Rubin Philip, a senior management member of the anglican church organisation in South Africa, went to the Durban High Court and managed to get a verdict preventing that the weapons can be transported across South Africa to Zimbabwe. Good on you Rubin Philip!

In addition to this action the international trade union movement has joined forces against this weapons shipment. In effect trade unions across Southern Africa declared that their members would not help unload the shipment of weapons. Organized transport workers declared that they would not transport the weapons to Zimbabwe. It seems Comrade Mugabe has lost his other comrades' support. The longstanding African tradition of accepting foul leaders, as long as they're black, is rapidly becoming a thing of the past. Mind you, even the Germans are getting in on the act. A German government bank assisting third world development lend a couple of million Euros to a state owned Zimbabwean steel company. The loan was guaranteed by Zim's able government. Of course, it was never repaid. The place is bankrupt and comfortably burning its non-existent midnite oil, mostly courtesy of South African tax payers. Well, the German bank quickly pounced when it heard the story of the shipment. It also went to the Durban High Court to get the shipment seized in lieu for the money owed to it by Bob's government.

It goes without saying, the Chinese captain quickly moved his rustbucket out of South African waters and has since looked for a new harbor to unload his deadly freight. Mozambique's foreign minister declared that he would not permit the shipment to be unloaded in his country. Rumours have it that the ship is en route to Angola, but it has been suggested that the ship would barely have enough fuel on board to reach the most southern harbors of that country. Looks like end game on that front for Bob Madhat Mugabe.